Why You Feel Like You're Failing as a Father and Husband
You Don’t Need Another Pep Talk. You Need a Wake-Up Call.
Why do you feel like you’re failing as a father and husband?
Let me hit you with the truth no one else dares to say:
You’re not failing because you’re lazy. Or because you don’t care. Or because you’re weak.
You feel like you’re failing because no one taught you how to win at this.
No one gave you the manual for leading a family without losing yourself.
No one showed you how to feel everything and still stand strong.
No one told you that being a man in this world would mean bleeding quietly behind a mask of strength, while your soul silently begs to just fucking feel again.
The Silent Pain You Don’t Talk About
Have you ever looked at your wife and felt her drifting away—and had no clue how to pull her back?
Stared at your kids and wondered if they’ll remember you as the man who showed up… or the one who snapped?
Laid in bed next to the woman you love, feeling like a stranger in your own home?
You’re not alone. This is the inner war of the modern man.
And if you’re here, it means you’re ready to do something about it.
Who I Am and Why I Give a Damn
I’m Jason Plevell. The Obstacle Remover.
I work with high-performing men who are slowly dying inside. Men who look like they have it all together on the outside—but inside?
They’re cracked. Hollow. Lost in the chaos of marriage, fatherhood, business, and unresolved pain.
This blog exists for one reason: To wake men the hell up.
This is a movement. A brotherhood. A rebellion against emotional suppression and quiet suffering.
We are Emotionally Jacked Men.
And it starts with seeing the truth.
The Real Reason You Feel Like You’re Failing
You were raised in a world that worshipped work ethic and shamed emotion.
Dad went to work. Mom handled the emotions. Boys didn’t cry. Therapy was for broken people.
Now here you are: a grown-ass man trying to lead a family, run a business, be a lover, a protector, a provider and an emotional anchor.
And you’re doing it with a nervous system that’s more fried than gas station chicken wings and the emotional intelligence of a traffic cone.
That’s not your fault.
But it is your responsibility.
When I Knew I Was Failing
I was standing in the kitchen. My kid asked for juice.
Simple, right?
I snapped.
Not because of the juice. But because I had been bottling everything up:
Shame. Resentment. Pressure. Pain.
And when I snapped, I saw something in my kid’s eyes that broke me more than a decade of childhood trauma ever could.
A flinch. A micro-expression that said:
"My dad is not safe."
That moment changed everything for me.
Five Brutal Symptoms of the Quiet Breakdown
You know this is you if:
You explode over small shit, then hate yourself for days
Your wife feels like a critic, not a partner
You feel guilty when you’re working, resentful when you’re not
You avoid silence because silence brings the demons
You secretly fantasize about running away, disappearing, starting over
Sound familiar?
Good. That means you’re finally being honest.
The truth? You’re not failing.
You’re being called to evolve.
The Real Obstacle: You’re Reacting, Not Responding
Most men parent and partner from the nervous system of a 7-year-old boy.
That boy never felt seen, safe, or supported.
So he learned to protect himself.
He armored up.
He shut down.
Now he’s driving the bus.
And you’re trying to lead your family like a man—while that scared little kid calls the shots.
This is generational emotional constipation.
And it’s time to shit it out. Figuratively.
Unless you’re into metaphysical fiber supplements. Then maybe literally too.
Step 1: Regulate Your Nervous System
If your body is in fight, flight, or freeze, you cannot access love.
You can’t connect with your wife if your brain thinks she’s the enemy.
You can’t show up for your kid’s meltdown if your inner child is silently freaking out.
You must train your nervous system to feel safe in discomfort.
Here’s how:
Cold showers
Breathwork
Training to failure
Stillness without screens
Not soft. Savage.
Step 2: Rewrite the Story You Inherited
You have to meet the boy inside you.
The one who thought he had to earn love.
The one who learned that emotions get punished.
The one who believed silence was safer than expression.
He doesn’t need another lecture.
He needs your love.
Give him the safety he never had.
Because until you do, he’ll keep running the show—and he’s exhausted.
Step 3: Reconnect With Truth, Not Perfection
Start speaking your truth.
Tell your wife what’s real.
Not what’s rehearsed.
Sit with your kids. Listen. Don’t correct. Just connect.
Let them see your humanity, not just your authority.
When you do this, the house gets lighter.
Your wife softens. Your kids open up.
Not because you fixed them. But because you finally stopped running from yourself.
The Deepest Truth Most Men Never Face
You’re not afraid of failing your family.
You’re afraid of being seen for who you really are… and still not being enough.
That’s the real obstacle.
And it’s a lie.
Because you are enough.
You just haven’t healed the part of you that believes otherwise.
So I’ll leave you with this:
What would it take for you to believe you are already the father and husband your family needs… if you just got out of your own way?
Now Make the Choice
Click here to book a free call with me: https://calendly.com/theobstacleremover/discovery
Let’s break down your reactive patterns, one by one. This is real. This is raw. This is the work that changes lives.
Or you can keep pretending it’s not that bad.
Until the day your wife says she’s done.
Your kids stop trusting you.
Or you look in the mirror and can’t even recognize the man staring back.
You choose.
Need a guide through this storm?
Get tools, guidance, and brotherhood here: https://theobstacleremover.com/store